Do I REALLY Believe?

My first hint happened several years ago.  We had gone out to eat and my oldest daughter, who was around 12 at the time, started crying in the car after dinner.

Well, if you happen to have daughters, you will know that this is nothing new!  Someone is crying all of the time!  I was a bit surprised to see who was crying as she usually was the least dramatic of the four.

So being the good mom and all, I asked her what was wrong, her reply changed my life.

"I am so sad because our waiter was so kind and friendly and I am afraid that he might not be a Christian and end up spending eternity in Hell."

We spent about thirty minutes trying to help her feel better. 

We tried to explain that usually friendly people believe in God....that is what makes them friendly (total untrue pile of poop!). 

Then we moved on to the explanation that if he was not a Christian, he is so nice that we were sure SOMEONE would tell him about Christ. 

We ended the dramatic session by praying that God would send someone to tell him about Christ if he did not already know. 

Then it happened...you know,......the still small voice that you sometimes hear whisper when you are really quiet, or you hear it shouting when you are really wrong....said...."I just did."

"I sent someone to tell him, but they did not speak."

My mind went into defense mode.  I mean, what in the world did God expect me to do?  Just ask him?!  I would look like an idiot.  "Hello Mr. Waiter, do you know that Jesus died for you and wants to offer you eternal life?"  Really??!!

I was able to quiet the voice enough to eventually forget about it....for a while.

Several years later we took a family mission trip.  My thoughts were that we would go, help do what we could, and come home feeling pretty good about ourselves.

A couple of things happened to change my thoughts.

1.  The organization we went through believes mission trips are for full frontal evangelism.  You might do some work to help around a bit, but the main purpose is to form relationships and share Jesus.  Unfortunately I found that out AFTER we had already paid all of our money!

2.  Months before the trip we began to pray a dangerous prayer.  The one where you ask God to help you see others the way He sees them.  To feel the way He feels.  It sounded good at the time.

3.  God was faithful, as He always is, and we did see and feel the way He did and we fell in love with the people we went there to witness to. 

A strange thing happens when you love people the way that God loves.  You begin to care about their eternity.  It becomes what you think about most during the day.  You pray about it over and over.  You find it hard to function in your everyday life because you realize that there is so much work to be done...the harvest is plenty, but the workers are few.

And then you realize the opportunities that you wasted as you lived all those years not caring about people's souls.  You mourn for all of the days that have passed and you did not further the kingdom.

Where before, donating some food, clothing, or money was more than enough, you now see it as just a way to quiet the voice.

The voice saying..."I sent someone to tell them, but they did not speak."

Will I sometimes look like an idiot?  You bet!
Will I screw up and say something stupid?  Been there, done that!
Will I go to bed some nights amazed at my inadequacy?  Yes!

But I will not go back.  I won't go back to not caring or to being so selfish that I care more about what I am thought of in this temporary realm as opposed to the eternal. 

There are times that I begin to slide.  I get busy and the day to day chores attempt to swallow up any thoughts I have about tomorrow.  They choke tomorrow out with today.

But now I know the voice.  I hear it and I allow Him to overwhelm me. 

I believe.  I REALLY believe that there is a heaven and there is a hell.  I REALLY believe that Jesus is the only way to spend eternity in heaven in the presence of God.  I REALLY believe that we are all equal, special and loved by God and He wants each of us there with Him.

I REALLY believe it. 

Do You?  If you do, you won't be able to keep your mouth shut and not speak any longer.